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Coming Back

October 19, 2013

It has been months since I’ve logged on and posted. It’s been a difficult road this past year or so, and blogging–writing at all–is a harsh reminder of my dad’s death. As I posted before I disappeared, he was a strong influence on my writing. Actually, I now know he was the reason I wrote. In a way, I think he wanted me to write because he never had time to do it himself. He would reprimand me for my breaks from writing, so I know he would be very angry with me right now. He also helped coax me through my ideas and try new things. While going through his things, I found multiple xeroxed magazine articles for parents of young writers, and that made me feel special and pressured.

Well, I’m finally ready to post a new ebook, which means I have no choice but to start on the next book. I could’ve and should’ve started six or seven months ago, but any time I sit down to write, I think of him, and so far it’s a negative muse not a positive one. I need to think of a way to make it positive again. I also had posted how I found his writings from the past few years and hoped to work on them and finish them. I assumed that by now I would be eager to get into his writings, as it would feel like he was around me. How naive I was.

All in all, this probably reads as a depressing post, but I’m not depressed. I’m hopeful. I think I’m ready to move on, to try again.

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